Parents: Would You Mind If Your 21 Year Old Daughter Was Dating A 25 Year Old Man?
I’ve starting seeing this guy: he’s 25 and I’m 21. It’s not serious yet, just have been on a few dates. But I like him so far! Since the relationship hasn’t turned into anything yet, I haven’t told my parents I’m seeing him. Do you think this age difference is too much this early in life? How would you react if you had a daughter in the same situation? We’re at similar dating levels so it’s pretty evenly matched in dating experience.
Well as long as he isnt a serial killer I wouldnt have a problem. 4 years is only alot if you’re 4 and he’s 8 but 21 and 25 is hardly an age gap. Go for it!
Nope, I am the mother of a 20 year old, who is seeing a 24 year old, and I don’t mind a bit. It’s quite a fine age difference.
What is that old rule of thumb? Half his age plus 7? Just kidding. My personal rule of thumb is no more than a decade older or younger. Beyond that, you are with somebody who isn’t really in your generation or the same place in life, so you’re unevenly matched.
Cases in point, two ladies at our church are married to men 15 years older than they are – both of them are going to lose their husbands soon because they are close to 80, and these ladies are in their 60s. They are both taking care of their husbands who are suffereing from Alzheimer’s. Very sad – then they will be alone and who will take care of them?
They shouldn’t have a problem with it. Usually they feel that they have nothing to worry about because hes stable in his life and could help you grow. They might have a problem with how serious it could become though. So you should make sure they know that its not serious right now and if/when it becomes serious let them know your ready for it and your confident in your relationship
when i met my husband i was 16 and he was 24, though nothing really came of our dating (because he respected my wish to wait) we were dating. My mother found out and just smiled and said as long as your happy. We were so in love that 3 months after i turned 18 we got married and decided to have children. I am now 22 and he is 30, we have 2 beautiful girls and a precious little boy. So the way i see it if my daughter was happy with a guy older i wouldn’t say anything but “As long as you are happy”
I wouldn’t worry about it. That is close enough in age (and old enough) to know what you want as a couple. My parents had to deal with me dating a 35 year old man when I was your age, that would be too much, as I found out. If my daughter was like you I don’t think I’d have anything to worry about. Sounds like you have a good head on your shoulders to think it through like this. Good luck.
My daughter is only a month old so I can’t really give an opinion on a parent’s POV, but I am also 21 (will be 22 next month) and my fiance is 33. Everyone made a big deal out of it at first but they got over it and everyone in my family loves and accepts him.
Four years isn’t all that much of an age differece. Hell, I was dating a 19 yr old when I was 14! I know…disgusting as I look back now but it happened.
i’m 27 & i’m dating a 22 year old. it’s never an issue except maybe when we hang out with his friends, who tend to be far more immature. & even then i just have to be patient. it’s no big deal no one ever questions the difference because they don’t notice it. only at my birthday party did his cousins find out. there was never a need to share it. we get along so well. we only just joke about it sometimes. if you’re not worried no one else should be.
well, I’m 28 and my husband is 32, he is 4 and a half years older than me…I began dating him at 17, my mother actually set us up (she worked with him, and thought he was really sweet) no I would not have a problem with my daughter at the age of 21 dating a 25 year old. If your parents do, I would have to question them…I mean…your 21.
Four years isn’t that bad. The only issue you may have is if ya’ll are still in college. Once he leaves (assuming he is further along), you will still have to work around school schedules and such. This shouldn’t really be a problem though if both of ya’ll live in the same city as your school.
I don’t see those ages as a problem. You’re 21, so you should have a reasonable ability to know if a guy is a loser or not.
I have an 18 year old daughter, and I think she is too young to date a 24 year old, but I know she will be ready in 3 years.
I met my hubby when I was 23 – he was 37. I don’t think a 4 year age difference is anything really. If you were 18 and dating a 30 year old, then I might think it was weird, but you are a full fledged adult and he’s not that much older than you.
Look im 21 years old and my boyfriend is 25 .. Age dosent mean **** !! my mom aint mad. we have 4 years diffrence WHoOOo what a big deal Looll !! Im not saying if a 21 years old is going out with a 40 years old man,, thats diffrent. But n e ways at 21 your a woman and suppose to know what u want. and if the man u are with makes u happy GOOD .
Nope, 21 is old enough to make your own decisions, and 4 years is not that big of an age difference (after you become an adult of course). I wouldn’t be upset with my daughter dated someone a little older than she was.
Considering that I meet my husband just before I turned 20 and he was 27 I don’t think it would be a issue. By that age it isn’t your parents choice. It’s your choice!!!
Missy
28, hubby 36, 1 little boy with one more on the way
No. When I was 21 I was dating a 33 y.o. man. My parents loved him and oh yeah we finally decided to get married 9 years ago. 4 years is not a big deal at all. If he were the same age as your parents that would be weird.
Not even remotely an issue.
Had you been dating when you were 15 and he was 19, that would have been another matter in my mind. But you’re both adults, and to an adult, 4 years really makes no difference.
That really doesn’t sound bad to me. I’m 23 years old, and have two little girls. If they grew up and were at your age dating a 25 year old, I really don’t see why that would be a problem. Good Luck!
No, not really. My husband is 27 and I’m 24. When we started dating he was 21 and I was 19. I think that the ages are close enough that it shouldn’t prompt too much of a problem.
No, I wouldn’t mind. Both parties are adults. A 4 year age difference when you’re in your 20’s and over is not that big of a deal.
If they were 15 and 19, my response would have been different.
No, not at all. Continue seeing him and don’t let a silly thing like age get in the way. Its only four years. If it were 6 -10 that would be stretching it a little. good luck!
I definitely would not mind
I think that after 18, any age difference is acceptable. I would totally accept the situation and be excited that my daughter is in a relationship!
You are an adult and can make your own choices. 4 years is not much at all once you are in adulthood. As a parent, I would look at the person instead of the age.
My wife was 19 and I was 26 when we started dating. Four years later we got married and now we’ve been married 25 years. A four year age difference is unimportant. Happiness and compatibility are what counts.
As a father of 2 daughters aged 23 & 21 I’d have no problems at all. My primary concern is their happiness. On the other hand if they were 25 and seeing a man of 21 again if they were happy no problem.
Not at all. It’s perfectly fine. A kinda general rule-which I don’t personally follow, but I know people that do. Is the girl should be half the guys age plus 7.
No I wouldn’t find that, it’s only 4 years. If she starts dating in the 30’s then I might start to worry but 4 years difference isn’t bad at all.
I don’t see it as anythign to be concerned about whatsoever. You are an adult and should be able to date whomever you want.
remember that girls mature faster than men so therfore you are onthe same maturity level ! LOL
Why are you even asking, you are a grown woman, feel free to be with a 50yr old man if it makes you happy.
I think that age gap is alright, better him being older, maybe he is more of an adult than a 21 year old man.
I wouldn’t mind if the guy was good to her and they were happy.
When I met my husband I was 17 and he was 22, now Im 30 and hes 35 and our life together has been perfect.
I was 21 when I married and my husband was 28. Once you get out of your teens I don’t think age matters so much.