Are You Dating Someone Who Is Separated And Wonder About The Ex?
Like if maybe you’ve been dating your bf or gf for awhile and wondering if maybe the ex is right and the person you’re with isn’t such a great person?
Like if maybe you’ve been dating your bf or gf for awhile and wondering if maybe the ex is right and the person you’re with isn’t such a great person?
Yes. I dated a guy who’s ex wife said “I hope you never get married again!” and those words stuck with me because he claimed to have zero fault in the fail of the marriage. I have always believed that no matter what happens, there is two people involved in a divorce, both have been at fault at some point. He had a good amount of fault for the failure of his marriage. He lacked affection, tenderness, and was verbally abusive and emotionally neglectful. He was so stressed out all the time, there was always something to be angry about, he had big anger issues. Of course, it took me 5 months to see this. By the end, I was sent to the hospital with a virus… I put my own needs on the back burner so much during our relationship that I made myself sick to the point of almost permanently damaging my liver. I would pop a few tylenols and go to work, or go see him, or be there for him and his family, and pretend I was fine… he and I both knew I was sick and something wasn’t right… but of course, something in his life was always more important than what I needed.
My (now ex) boyfriend and I dated for over a year while he was separated. There were children involved, as well. I never once doubted that he was the right person for me. The only flaw was our inability to go public with our relationship due to his separation status and not divorced.
In a separation, both parties are feeling hurt and wondering if they’ve failed at a committed relationship. There are issues on both sides to be worked out. As the proverbial third wheel, you are not in the best of situations, but there is always the possibility that things will work out. You need to decide if you wish to take that risk or success or having your heart broken.
As well, if your partner is dating you and the ex is seeing now, it makes sense that the ex is feeling rather bitter that the other person has moved on, while s/he is home alone. It’s only natural that venomous words would be uttered. I would try to see past all of that.
All of that being said, if your partner is abusing you, neglecting you, or otherwise harming you, get out. If things are great except for the fact that s/he is only separated and not divorced, it’s up to you to decide what route you will take.